There are more unneeded details emerging regarding the whole Nick "Idiot Son" Hogan auto accident kerfuffle, the wreckage of which is pictured above. For those of you just waking up from a coma and getting reacclimated with the professional wrestling/offspring of D-list celebrities landscape, I'll defer to FOX News/The Associated Press for a synopsis:August 27 -- A Toyota Supra driven by Hogan's 17-year-old son, Nick Bollea, was traveling at a high rate of speed at about 7:30 p.m. Sunday, Clearwater Police spokesman Wayne Shelor said. Bollea lost control and hit a raised median. The car flipped around, and the back end hit a palm tree.What perplexes me is this last detail. Why is a 22 year old guy doing hanging out with a 17 year old boy? I've watched my share of Dateline NBC: To Catch A Predator (hoping that a washed up grappler like crack connoisseur and deadbeat dad Jake "The Snake" Roberts, degenerate slime ball Sean Waltman, Hogan lapdog and exemplar of physical unfitness Brian Knobbs, or even a jobber to the stars in the mold of Don Herbert will saunter through that front door thinking they are about to engage in leisurely iced tea consumption and uncomfortable conversation followed by an illicit tryst with an all-American teen, only to get verbally bitch slapped by America's foremost gonzo journalist Chris Hanson) and let me tell you, this seems like a classic case of sexual perpetration and perversion. Alas, we might never know the truth as there is a very real chance that Mr. Graziano (that's probably his not his real name, but rather an inconspicuous handle for trolling online teen chatrooms across the interwebs) will not survive this accident.
Police identified Bollea's passenger as 22-year-old John J. Graziano of Dunedin [Italics, mine]. He remained in critical condition Monday at Bayfront Medical Center, a hospital spokeswoman said.
As unsophisticated and unfocused my analysis of the Hogan-Graziano connection may be, it raises an even broader set of questions. Why didn't the geriatric Hogan take away his whippersnapper son's car keys/driving privileges after his earlier speeding citations and reckless driving infractions? Why would the Hulkster not only support but financially bankroll his son's delusions of race car superstardom? Didn't he see what happened to Bobby Brady? Would the Hulkster approve of wannabe ghetto fabulous diva Brooke Hogan hanging out with a 22 year old guy? Of course, not. Why the double standard? Why the hypocrisy from America's most levelheaded and sagacious father and husband? [Because if anybody going to take advantage of his daughter's sexuality, its going to be him for the purpose of boosting her earning potential and thereby lining his pockets] And why o' why is that wherever a camera, video crew, and someone who happens to share the last name "Hogan" are present, so too is a certain follicle deficient, terror plot masterminding, endangered insect abusing, twice a day tanning salon patronizing, gristly skinned devil incarnate?
Probably for the same reason we blog so prolifically yet eloquently about professional wrestling...the notoriety.
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