Tonight was my first face-to-television exposure withVH1's Friday night ratings juggernaut Celebrity Rehab. About 10 minutes into the inanity, I had an epiphany. I realized that Chyna, pictured here impersonating a cow, is a far more compelling character and viable brand when she is absolutely annihilated on some combination of booze, powders, prescription drugs, and X-Pac semen than when she is teetotaling her way through yet another directionless and humdrum day.On behalf of Arabian Facebuster, I implore Chyna to reconsider her decision to stay clean. Based on tonight's episode, I am being generous by describing her newfound sobriety as a catastrophic failure and unmitigated disaster.
That is all...
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