Friday, February 06, 2009

"Move over Pete Rose, Here Comes Fmr. Dept. of Labor Secretary Robert Reich"

Apparently flip-flopping Acadamy Award Nominee Mickey Rourke's name around Wrestlemania 25 just isn't enough celebrity star power for the 25th. anniversary of the "brawl that started it all", as WWE Superstar and formerly admitted "Big Red Retard" aka Kane, aka Issac Yankem DDS, aka The Fake Diesel, aka Unabomb, aka The Christmas Creature, aka Ron Paul "ReLOVE-U-TION" subcommandante Glenn Jacobs has taken it upon himself to inject an even more scintillating celebra-fued into the wrastlemania rumor mill....

Come the fifth of April, of this, our Lord's Year of Twothousand-ought- nine, could wee little ones be witness to....

on february 3 Kane writes (uses a voice-mimicking device held against his scarred and ruined trachea):
"Professor Reich:

I have some questions about some of the points that you brought up when you appeared on CNN’s The State of the Union show Superbowl Sunday. Although all my own training in economics is purely autodidactic, it seems to me that your arguments rest on faulty premises."

That's funny, I didn't realize they let you watch the HELLLLL!!!! Kane continues:

"When asked what is the fastest way for the government to create jobs (a question which itself relies on the erroneous presumption that the government has the ability to "create" jobs), you replied with a three-part answer, and first stated that "almost all economists agree" with you.

Whether almost all economists agree or not of no importance, but gives your answer an air of authority. Unfortunately, it is the policies of these same economists which have caused the mess in which America currently finds itself. While "almost all economists" may still possess authority in academia, their credibility on Main Street is sorely lacking. In addition, many economists do not agree with you. In fact, Austrian economists vehemently disagree with you"

Who and/or what is Kane doing with these so called "Austrian Economists". Are they practicing some kind of vodoo economics? And if so, just how vehement is their vehemence? Excuse me, Kane goes on:

"The government’s second priority, you said, should be to build infrastructure – putting people to work building roads, bridges, a new electrical grid, and a broadband internet system.

While we certainly need those things, how is this going to create jobs and why is it the government’s business to build them anyway?"

Excuse me, WTF?!?

"While the government can create jobs in one sector of the economy, it can only do so by destroying jobs in another sector of the economy. Perhaps you are familiar with Frédéric Bastiat’s famous essay What Is Seen and What Is Not Seen. In it, Bastiat explains that when the government undertakes a project such as building a bridge we see the benefits it brings – the jobs that it creates. What we do not see are the things that are destroyed because of the project – the jobs that are not created because the government confiscates the resources needed to create them."

See? As in "See No Evil"?!? Excuse me, Kane concludes:

"The government’s third priority, according to you, should be tax cuts. I wholeheartedly agree. Let’s eliminate personal income tax*, property taxes**, sales taxes***, and corporate taxes***f'n*!, as well as the onerous regulations that have driven so many companies out of the country. Unfortunately, that’s probably not what you meant by tax cuts, is it"

(insert shower scene "Psycho" stabbing theme here * and here**, again here***, and especially the fuck here****)

"All in all, Professor Reich, it seems to me that your arguments defy logic and common sense. However, as a prominent economist, public policy expert, and opinion molder, I’m sure that you can explain what I am missing. I anxiously await your reply... at Wrestle Mania... (italics mine)."

As of the time of this posting, Fmr. Department of Labor Secretary Robert Reich has yet to make a formal response to Kane's accusations. Let's keep our fingers crossed...

the rev.


Pencil Neck Geek said...

Thank you for covering this important story that has been all but ignored by the mainstream media outlets.

I always figured that the Big Red Machine would have more Keynesian leanings, but I guess the Ron Paul t-shirt says it all...

The Rev. von Fury said...

UPDATE: Check out Citizen Kane's Blog:

the rev.

Malibu Sands said...

We better shut 'er down...there is no way Arabian Facebuster can't compete with Kane's regurgitation and elaboration of libertarian talking points.